Easier said than done

So I've read through 6 chapters of "When God Writes Your Love Story" and already a lot more things have been brought to my attention more than it did 3 years ago. The first thing I've learned is that "handing the pen over to God" doesn't happen overnight. It is way easier said than done. I saw a quote on Facebook today that caught my eye by Craig Groeschel, "The thing you fear the most is the thing you trust God with the least." Unfortunately, this is very true at least for me.

In this book, Eric and Leslie Ludy talks about giving pieces of your hearts to people you've dated or had a semi-relationship with in my case. It seems like every guy I've liked, I've given a big piece of my heart to them right off the bat. Sometimes I actually wonder how much of heart there is left to give to my future husband... Leslie talks about how every "break up" felt like a huge divorce. TELL ME ABOUT IT!!! One of the guys I ended up breaking off our friendship with, my friends and I would actually call him my husband because we always fought like an old married couple. Pretty sad, huh? I'm surprised we didn't have anything signed saying we wouldn't talk to one another for a certain period of time.

The third thing that stood out to me was getting to know the creator of love himself before going any further. Again this is easier said than done. Since going to church for the past 22 years, I tell myself a lot, "I know God. I go to church, right?" Yes, I go to church every Sunday morning, Sunday evening and Wednesday night. But do I really know God??? I'm guessing not as much as I should. I've never been the greatest about doing a personal Bible study everyday. I'm really going to try to get into the habit of doing that and making a habit of it.

The last thing I will mention that I've learned is, so far, I don't think I'm a very good wife. The book quotes Proverbs 31:12 about being a loyal wife all of your life. "'She [the wife of godly character] bring him [her husband] good, not harm, all the days of her life.'" Part of me fears that I've already screwed this one up big time. I know that one of these days, when I do finally meet my husband, I will have to tell him a bunch of baggage that he may not be very happy with me about. I'm just hoping that when that time comes God will help me to get through that and help my husband to be understanding and forgiving.

Giving the pen to God

If you've never read or heard of the book, "When God Writes Your Love Story," you should definitely read it! I read it once my Freshman year and found it recently at home during Christmas break and decided to bring it back to school and read it through again. I'm hoping to get a different point of view now than I did 3 years ago. Back then, even though I was interested in getting married, I think I was more into the dating world than anything. But I thought for sure that coming to a Christian university, I would find my husband. I now have 3 months left of college and, well, no husband yet. I've been getting a lot more serious about the marriage world since I am about to graduate and a lot of my friends are married so that can be a bit awkward at times. There is really only 1 couple I do not feel like the third wheel around. Honestly I've never had a boyfriend and sometimes that can be embarrassing to say at age 22, but I'm actually hoping it will be to my advantage in the long run. I've been on dates and have been interested in several guys while at school here, but I think I made a lot of mistakes when it came to picking the ones to be interested in.

This is where I am going to be really honest in my blog, so get ready. Every guy that I've liked or gone out with more than once, I assume he will end up being my husband because if a guy seems the least bit interested, he wants to marry you, right? Wrong. I really wish somebody had gotten in my face and told me that 3 1/2 years ago. A question I've asked God about a thousand times is: My parents got married when they were younger than I am now. What's wrong with me? Another honest thing about me: I've had a really hard time letting God be in charge of my love life. I assumed that every guy I met, I thought God had put him in my life for good. Again, maybe God just wanted me to have another friend.

So back to the book. I started reading it again last night and hope to keep it up until I finish it. I'm really hoping to get a different perspective on love and marriage by reading this book a second time around. I realize that since I be leaving Edmond after graduation, I may not find anyone here and I'm okay with that...I think. I'm ready to not be the 3rd, 5th, or 7th wheel and actually go on double dates with my friends. I'm just praying God will lead me to the right man soon, but I want Him to choose my husband because, based on the past, I'm probably not very good at it!

New project!

One of my classes this semester is PR Workshop, which is taking the place of my newspaper workshop class. While I enjoyed writing for the campus newspaper, I felt I needed a change so when this class became available, I jumped on it! I think it will give me more experience in the world of PR before graduating. My project for this semester is helping out with the Memorial Marathon, which takes place at the end of April. OC has its own team, Team OC, which has had the biggest number of participants in Oklahoma City for the last two years.

My job is to get as much media publicity for Team OC as possible. I will be trying to get stories in local newspapers, including the Daily Oklahoman, and hopefully some actual news coverage the week before and the day of the event. I've never done anything like this so I'm really excited! I will be going to News 9 next Friday for a question/answer session and to view their daily morning meeting. Hopefully by doing this I will know who to contact when it gets closer to marathon time. I'm going to try to keep my blog updated with Team OC information and how the plans are going as much as possible!

The Year to Come

Happy New Year!!! I know its the 7th, but better late than never, right?! I've been pretty busy spending time with family and friends in Michigan. It won't be long before I'm back in good ol' Oklahoma! I have a lot of mixed emotions about this semester and this year in general. I'm taking 18 hours this semester and will be graduating in April. I'm not quite ready to leave OC, but I guess there is a time for everything. I will also be doing a lot of job hunting this semester. I'm really hoping I will have a place to live and a job by the time graduation comes around. It can be scary thinking about the fact that I may not have a job by that time and not have a way to pay rent. I guess that's what praying is for!!! :)

My New Year's resolution is to get healthy and back in shape. Since I'm still in Michigan, I am beginning this resolution a week late. Monday I plan to start eating healthy and working out to be more in shape and to have more energy. Luckily, I have friends that will be doing it with me so we can encourage each other! What are your resolutions? What are you looking forward to about 2011???